Personal

Let’s Begin at the Beginning

The calendar has turned and it’s a new year. Although, as a perpetual student, the Autumn is my real fresh start, my new beginning, I am feeling swept up in the change of the calendar and have decided to do that most cliché of things. Start a project that I almost definitely will not stick to because I have a truly terrible habit of not sticking to things that I start. However, I just read a very motivating piece about what the New Year could be and have come over all optimistic. Therefore, let’s start.

This year I am going to finish Wingless, the novel that I have been writing since NaNoWriMo 2015, but honestly, that I’ve had in my head since 2009. When I have finished it, I will go back over it and I will make it better and I will not stop working on it just because my characters have found their way home because there is so much more to do and after all this time, I should do their story justice.

I am going to kick my Masters in the ass and do myself proud academically for once rather than letting my fear of failing stop me from trying. And if I do fail, if I turn out not to be as brilliant as I expected or was always told, then that will be okay too. I will have tried and I will have no let my fear control me and that will be the biggest victory of them all.

I don’t want to start eating healthier because that is synonymous for me with food that I will not enjoy, but I want to start cooking meals, meals that I might not normally try, even if it means I’m just cooking for myself.

I want to say yes more, to different things, and if no one’s asking, I will seek out the adventure myself. I will get over my fear of asking for company. My anxiety is not everything that I am and I will not let it have the last word here.

If my current life plan doesn’t work out over the next year then it will be an opportunity to seek out a different plan, in a different place and that will be awesome and it will not mean that I have to stop learning or discovering, but that I can do so in a new way, in a different way.

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